Bubblegum Bangers Rally "UPDATE" 03.10.2008

Bubblegum Bangers Rally Day 1, ferry to St Malo By Aaron Scoones

Sat 27/09, 14.30, Ferry to St Malo

IT’S finally here.

After months of waiting the Bubblegum Bangers Rally is on the go.

In blazing sunshine at Crabby Jacks car park this morning, the 160 odd competitors in their 60 or so cars all gathered to start their European adventure.

The atmosphere was one of apprehension and excitement.

There was also feeling in the air with all the fancy dress going on like we were just about to get on a giant bus party.

But instead of taking in the Last Post and the Jamaica, we’re taking in five countries in six days.

We’re ending up in Paris and not Follies.

Despite the rules stating that the cars could not be worth more than £500, they looked fantastic.

There’s a stretched Renault, a shortened Renault, a black and pink car, a pink and black car, a Spongebob Squarepants 4×4, a Datsun with a golf tee on the top and a Dick Dastardly’s Wacky Racers car complete with two Dick Dastardlys among the group.

But the best was an old Honda converted into a police car topped off with the red and blue lights and sirens.

I’d be very surprised if they don’t meet any problems from the different constabularies we’ll meet on the rally.

What was just as impressive as the cars was the number of people gathered at Crabby Jacks to send the rally off.

There were hundreds.

And when the time came for it to get underway, there were emotional scenes as parents, family and friends hugged their loved ones away.

I don’t know if the police boys had a tearful send off.

But it might be the last time they are seen in Guernsey.

However, it all got too much for me as there was no one to see me off.

So I texted my Dad in South London.

Never one to overdo it, this was my his reply:

‘God speed. England expects.

‘It took Field Marshall Montgomery and the eighth army seven weeks to get to Paris and you have got to do it in five days. Dad.’

I don’t know if this was factually correct but it got me and my team mate Nick Mann going.

What was also uplifting was the number of people on the side of the road as we made our way to the harbour in our police convoy.

Which I’m pleased to report was by Guernsey Police and not the boys in the Honda.

Now on the 1pm ferry and with St Malo looming large on the horizon, our thoughts have moved to the task at hand.

We’ve got to make our way to our hotel in Rouen, whose name and address we were only told about this morning, and the rules state we’re not allowed to use SatNav.

If this was not difficult enough we’ve also got our first task, which again we’ve only just found out about, which is to turn up to tonight’s party in French fancy dress with a French person.

There’s a 200 Euro prize for the best outfit and if there is a dead heat, the tiebreaker is whoever’s French guest has come the furthest.

I’m thinking of going as Rene from Allo Allo with Manno as Yvette… (from thisisguernsey)

Bubblegum Bangers Rally, Day 1, RouenBy Aaron Scoones

Saturday, 27/09, 22.15, Novotel Hotel, Rouen


UNFORTUNATELY we never got round to dressing up Allo Allo style or obtaining any French people for the evening as it us took four and half hours to get to Rouen from St Malo when it was only supposed to take three hours.

The reason it took us so long was because we took a wrong turn out of St Malo and ended up in Dinan.

The whole thing with all the faffing about put around 30kms on our journey.

Added to the fact that we took another unscheduled detour near Caen and then we could not find the hotel when we arrived in Rouen, there was no time for the peripheries.

But here we are now, sat in the hotel bar on the outskirts of the town and that’s the main thing.

There are a few that have not been so lucky…

At the minute things are a bit hazy due to a lack of news from the field combined with the fizzy French beer being consumed.

But as far as I understand three vehicles have seriously broken down and are beyond repair.

First up is Jon Robilliard and Sadie Abbotts’ Penelope Pit Stop Rover 620 which blew a head casket outside Caen.

Their car is now at a garage heading for the crushers so they’ve had to grab a taxi to the hotel, which cost them EUR250.

By all accounts Ben Jones’ Team 18 have had a clutch failure and are missing in action, a cam belt has gone on a Vauxhall Omega leaving its driver and navigator immovable and the water pump went on Ben Lowndes’ BMW when he was going… well I won’t say how fast he was going.

They are all now going to jump in other cars.

Plus another car ended up in Rennes, at least two more vehicles are missing and one BMW team got stopped by the police well over the speed limit.

But they got away with it when they showed the police officer a printed statement explaining that they were on the Bubblegum Bangers Rally and that it was all in a good cause.

Again, hard facts are a bit difficult to come by at the moment…(from thisisguernsey)

Bubblegum Bangers Rally, day 2, south of AntwerpBy Aaron Scoones

Sunday, 3.20pm, Motorway Service Station 100km south of Antwerp

TODAY is another glorious day.

Myself and Nick have just crossed the Belgium border and are having a lunch baguette in a service station.

There’s not a cloud in the sky and as Noel Coward would say ‘It’s been most enjoyable’.

We’re heading for Amsterdam where we’re staying tonight but we have the worry of not knowing where our hotel is.

When we set off this morning from Rouen we were given our day’s task which is to solve a number of clues to reveal the name of the hotel.

In the course of this so far we’ve had to have our picture taken in front of Rouen cathedral, find out who was burnt at the stake on 30 May 1431 in the Old Market Square (Joan of Arc quiz fans!) and count the number of angels on the front of the gigantic Gothic cathedral in Amiens, plus have our picture taken in front of it wearing sunglasses and a hi-viz jacket for some reason.

And we’re now on our way into Antwerp to discover the names of the figurines on the city’s House of Guilds and to buy some chocolate from a specific sweet shop down a side alley to solve the mystery of our hotel.

After which we’ve then got to make our way up to Amsterdam.

I reckon we’ll be getting there after 10pm at this rate…

But we’re healthy and in good spirits, while the day’s start was a bit of a challenge for a few of our fellow rally drivers.

It turns out that the Red Eyed Racers team of Simon Coutanche and Lee Allez have a fully working beer pump complete with two kegs of lager, a chiller and an immense sound system in the back of their refurbished Guernsey Gas van.

Needless to say the party went on late into the night in the car park.

I felt like I was in an 80’s American high school movie.

All that was missing was a fire we were all dancing round, some sport jocks and cheerleaders and a little bloke in a basketball vest who turns into a werewolf.

Someone also must have been in mischievous spirits as when James Bentley went out to his car this morning, the Island FM DJ discovered that it had been covered in bubble wrap.

It was also confirmed early that four cars broke down yesterday.

Team 18’s Ssangyoung Mosso died and they are now continuing around Europe in a swanky BMW X3 hire car.

While Rusty Bullitt’s Vauxhall Omega, Knightriders’ BMW and Penelope Pit Stop’s Rover 620 are also all heading to St Malo on the back of a AA lorry or are heading to a crusher and the big multi-storey car park in the sky.

These teams are now scrounging lifts from other competitors.

I wouldn’t like to say who else is going to be eating the dust by tonight…(from thisisguernsey)

Bubblegum Bangers Rally, Day 2, Amsterdam By Aaron Scoones

28 September, 10.30pm, Amsterdam

WELL we’ve arrived in Amsterdam but I’m not happy.

We got here at 9.15pm after working out all the clues to obtain the name and address of our hotel.

But what has frankly staggered me is that the first team here, Global Warmers in their BMW, after setting out from Rouen at 8am this morning, arrived at 3.30pm.

Nearly a whole six hours before us.

Admittedly we were the last to leave Rouen at 10.30am and we had to stop for an hour or so in the afternoon to write the blog and send pictures.

Plus we also had a very agreeable morning coffee in a cafe by Amiens cathedral and we were stuck in a Dutch traffic jam outside Utrecht this evening, but even so, I can’t work what the hell we were doing.

My only idea is that we were driving so slowly that we actually travelled back in time.

However, we weren’t the last car here.

At the time of writing Donkeys on Tour are still out there somewhere and I hope they make it safely.

This brings me onto another thing that has staggered me, which is the camaraderie between the people on the rally.

It’s fantastic when you come across another car on the motorway, with the tooting of horns and waving, or when you see guys out and about in different European cities trying to solve the clues.

Everybody generally cares about how everybody else is doing.

Any way before I get too emotional, and I’m already tired with having to drive all day, I’m going to head into Amsterdam to see what’s going on….(from thisiisguernsey)

Bubblegum Bangers Rally Day 3, heading for Nurburgring By Aaron Scoones

29 September, 1.30pm, autobahn service station 43km from the Nurburgring

THE time is very nearly here.

In a couple of hours we’ll be hurtling round the Nurburgring.

Made famous for my generation by Top Gear and featuring on practically every computer racing game made in the last few years.

Recently on Project Gotham Racing 4 on my Xbox 360 (yes I am a geek), I’ve been racing round it in a Ford GT40 in the snow.

Today I’ll be going more sedately round the giant circuit in our Bubblegum Bangers Rally Mazda 323.

But I can’t wait.

So far, today has being more relaxing than yesterday’s epic of trying to uncover the clues dotted between Rouen and Amsterdam to locate out hotel.

And I’m not feeling as bad as I thought I would after a night out in the ‘Dam.

That’s because on a Sunday night it closes up at 1am.

I thought that since it is the den of iniquity where all things go, it’d be a 24-hour non-stop party zone.

But no, it is like any other European city.

The powers that be want to show the masses who’s in charge and curtail the fun.

To be honest, after being on the go all day yesterday and feeling my age come the evening, I’m quite pleased they did.

The only stress Nick and I have had to undergo today is negotiating our way down here.

The motorway map of north-west Germany is like a plate of spaghetti being attacked by an octopus.

Thanks to my map reading we decided to go right into the German industrial heartland, past Oberhausen, Cologne and Bonn.

But once through this we have entered a vista of rolling hills covered in golden Autumn trees.

My limited poetic skills cannot do justice as to how beautiful it is round here.

I’m also glad to report that everybody made it to Amsterdam with nobodies’ car dying on them.

After Saturday’s massacre where four cars bit the dust it seems that the ones that were going to pack up, did so in the first hundred miles or so. (from thisisguernsey)

Bubblegum Bangers Rally Day 3, Klobenz, GermanyBy Aaron Scoones

Monday 29 September, 11pm, Mercure Hotel, Klobenz, Germany

WHAT an experience.
The Nurburgring was better than I expected.

For a start the countryside it disects is just unbelievably beautiful.
And for my fellow geeks who like me are whittling away their life on their Xbox (yes ladies I am single and looking - please write to the Guernsey Press at the usual address), the circuit was far more twistier, tighter and hilly than it is on the computer games.

It is so up and down, your ears pop.
Also you have the g-forces which really pull you into your seat when you are on, for all intents and purposes, a 14 mile rollercoaster.

What also did not help was some light rain which fell just before we went out.

It left the road on the greasy side to say the least.

My co-driver Nick Mann found this out, as first up, he proceeded to spin us after one particluary nasty corner leading up to the infamous Carrousel section.

Manno used all of his extensive driving skills to make sure that we did not career into the looming bank but needless to say he finished the lap off at a more stately pace.

I think there’s been quicker ice ages than Manno’s time.

However, Nick was not the only Sarnian to come a cropper.

One local Skoda belonging to the Tulie brothers ended up in the bushes at the early corners and the Gone in 60 Minutes’ Capri blew a tyre and also had to be towed from the track.

The privilege cost them €60.

A number of cars and their drivers looked hot and bothered after going round.

Anyway, next up and the self styled Nelson Picquet of South London, me, was let loose on what Jackie Stewart once called ‘Green Hell.’

In my defence when I went round I had Dale Crowsley, the managing director of Forest Road Garage and the owner of the Guernsey Press rally car, in the passenger seat so I thought it best not to crash.

I posted 14min. 33sec, which I was quite happy with.

That was until Island FM’ superstar DJ and possibly the most competitive man on the planet, James Bentley, who also had a point to prove after himself and Carl Ward were defeated by your’s truly and Manno in the recent media hill challenge, did 12.55.

But it needs to be pointed that Bentely was in his beast of a KIA which is more powerful than our humble Mázda 323.

That aside, the whole day has been fantastic.

On the way to and from the Nurburgring, and off the autobahn, you are driving through some real chocolate box villages and the scenery is just so breathtaking.

But if today was so delightful, tomorrow promises to be the next level up as our challenge for the day is to drive down the San Benardino Pass in southern Switerland Alps.

It has been featured on Top Gear by Jeremy Clarkson who said it was one of the greatest driving roads in the world and on countless car commercials.

I can’t wait.(from thisisguernsey)

Bubblegum Bangers Rally Day 4, leaving KlobenzBy Aaron Scoones

Tuesday 30 September, 7.55am, Mercure Hotel, Klobenz, Germany

I’M NOT going to write much as we’ve got an Old Testament length journey today.

We’re setting off from our hotel in a little bit and it’s an a six hour drive at least through Germany, Austria, possibly Lichenstein and Switzerland down to San Bernardino Pass on the Swiss-Italian border.

Then we’ve got to make up our way up from the south east of Switzerland to the west of the country to Lausanne on Lake Geneva. It’s not going to be pretty(from thisisguernsey)

Bubblegum Bangers Rally Day 4; Lausanne, SwitzerlandBy Aaron Scoones

Day 4, 30 September, 11.55pm, Novotel Hotel Lausanne, Switzerland.

WHAT a long day.

We were in the car for more than 13 hours, drove around 600 miles through four different countries, got lost at least twice and went through two and a half tanks of petrol and half a packet of cigarettes (sorry I couldn’t resist the Blues Brothers reference).

After setting out from our hotel in Koblenz, Germany, just after 9am this morning, we finally arrived in Lausanne at 10.45pm.

It’s been a long slog and there were a lot of glazed eyes and tired looks in the bar tonight.

Nick and my day did not get off to the best of starts as it took us about half an hour to negotiate our way out of Klobenz.

But once on the autobahn, we were on a mission to get to our day’s task – to drive in convoy along the world famous San Bernardino Pass on the Swiss and Italian border.

We had to meet at 3pm and we were fighting time.

It was an epic drive down from the Rhineland which saw us pass Stuttgart and Ulm before taking in Austria and Lichenstein and into the southern Swiss Alps with it’s snow topped mountains.

But these two additional countries gave me a problem on the music front.

You see, I had prepared music on my iPod from each of the countries we were going to visit and those songs got played as soon as we entered them.

For France I had Edith Piaf, some MC Solaar and Johnny Hallyday singing Hey Joe in French.

For Belgium I had the excellent ‘2 Many DJs’ compilation album to hand and Golden Earring’s Radar Love for Holland.

Germany witnessed Wagner’s The Ride of The Valkyries and Nena’ 99 Luftballons (the German version) and the William Tell Overture welcomed us into Switzerland.

But with these unscheduled appearances in Austria and Lichenstein (we didn’t know we were going there until we were given the task late the night before), I had to think on the move.

So trawling through my iPod, we had Men at Work with Down Under blaring out when we came across the Austrian border (Australia/Austria – same difference) and Mozart’s Eine Kleine Nachtmusik.

But frankly I was stuck when it came to Lichenstein.

Lichenstein rock anyone?

Anyway, we finally made it to the Pass an hour late at 4pm.

The group was abuzz with stories of rally bangers being stopped by over-zealous Swiss police for not having a vignette in their windscreens which you can buy in the country’s service stations for CHF40.

However, if you got pulled over by the police and you didn’t have one, it’s a CHF100 fine, no questions asked.

It seemed like half of the group had been caught out.

Finally when a few of the last stragglers turned up, 40 cars with Guernsey plates went over the Pass which has been described as one of most beautiful drives in the world.

As we went up the steep first side, we were blessed by blue skies.

But when we got to the top and proceeded to go down the other side which has been featured on numerous car adverts and Top Gear test drives, we weren’t wowed by the breathtaking views looking over snow topped mountains.

We were greeted by thick fog.

Nevertheless it was still a worthwhile experience and something to brag to the boys about later.

From here in the south east corner of Switzerland we then had to make our way across Switzerland to Lausanne in the west.

This took another four hours in the dark plus 45 minutes trying to find our hotel once in Lausanne.

The less said about that the better.

It’s been a long day, but it’s been a good day.

And that first beer tasted good tonight as well.(fromthisisguernsey)

Bubblegum Bangers Rally Day 5; Lausanne, SwitzerlandBy Aaron Scoones

Day 5, 1 October, 8.50am, Novotel Hotel, Lausanne, Switzerland.

TODAY promises to be more gentile than yesterday as we have a comparatively easy six hour drive up to Paris.

At 4.30pm we’re joining the other 60 odd cars for a celebratory lap of the Arc de Triomphe. It’s going to be carnage. Best get going…(from thisisguernsey)

Bubblegum Bangers Rally Day 5, ParisDay 5, 5.45pm, Hotel Ibis, Paris

TODAY topped the Nurburgring and San Bernardino Pass.

Earlier this afternoon the Bubblegum Bangers Rally managed to bring one of the world’s greatest landmarks, the Arc de Triomphe, to a standstill.

Our day’s mission was to make it up from Switzerland to Paris, which we did surprisingly without any hitches.

For the first time myself and Nick weren’t late.

We’ve got into a routine where I drive and he navigates purely on the basis that I’m unable to read maps.

I’m more Ray Stubbs than Ray Mears.

But I like to think of it more in Top Gun terms – I’m Maverick whereas he’s Goose.

We joined the rest of the bangers parked on the side of one of the main roads onto the Arc at 4.30 pm before we all descended on what is quite possibly the world’s biggest roundabout.

In actual fact, James Bentley and Carl Ward in the Island FM car were already on it going round and round and round.

Driving on the Arc is like being stuck in a massive whirlpool.

There are no rules as mad Frenchman and women in their cars, buses, motorbikes and scooters are all on a mission to get off but with no regard for anybody else.

You soon lose count of the number of bumps, near misses, car horn toots and loud French expletitives.

We eventually got the 50 odd rally cars onto the Arc and slowly and surely we all gravitated to the middle.

And then some truly amazing happened.

We brought the inside lane to a standstill so that the Arc was entirely enclosed by multi-coloured bangers with Guernsey number plates.

You could look through the Arc and see fellow Bangers the other side.

It was a truly breathtaking experience and must have been an equally stunning sight as all the tourists under the landmark turned and started taking pictures of us while the rest of the traffic sped round.

Even the police had smiles on their faces.

We slowly drove round and round for a couple of minutes before we pulled away into the chaos.

And now we’re getting ready for the end of rally party and presentation night which is being held at the famous L’Atelier Renault Restaurant near the Eiffel Tower.

I’ve got a feeling a few beers will be drunk…(from thisisguernsey)

Bubblegum Bangers Rally Day 6, Guernsey

The Bubblegum Bangers arrive back in St Peter Port. (Picture by Andrew Le Poidevin)
Day 6, 2 October, 11.25pm, home.

THE end is here.

After 2,207 miles taking in eight different countries over five days, the end of the rally has come.

The last day started pretty ropey for most people after last night’s end rally party and presentation evening in the swanky L’Atelier Renault Restaurant in the centre of Paris.

It turned into a late one.

A few of us ended up in a little bar off the Champs d’Elysees and didn’t rock into the hotel until 4.30ish.

Getting up a couple of hours later proved to be a challenge but thankfully negotiating our way out of traffic hell that is Paris was surprisingly painless before hitting the peage and making St Malo in good time.

In actual fact it was a real pleasure driving through the Parisian suburbs in blazing sunshine while listening to The Verve.

I’ve already mentioned about our playlists for each country and I have to add that every day we made sure that we listened to some Seasick Steve but there were other times on the trip when our iPods have played integral parts in the experience.

For example, listening to The Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan while making our way out of Rouen on a beautiful Sunday morning, going through north Germany on our way to the Rhineland playing Sigur Ros and having the Orbital and The Future Sound of London on full blast as we meandered through the snow topped mountains of the Swiss Alps.

Excuse me while I wax lyrical but these were what Wordsworth called ‘moments in time’.

The whole rally has been full of great moments.

It’s hard to believe that we only set out on this adventure last Saturday.

We’ve done so much from the party in the car park in Rouen, the challenges in Amiens and Antwerp then onto a night out in Amsterdam, driving through stunning German countryside and round the Nurburgring.

Onto Switzerland and the mountains and the San Bernardino Pass, followed by bringing the Arc de Triomphe to a standstill before rounding it all off with a riotous party in Paris.

My personal highlight was the Arc de Triomphe.

It was truly uplifting to see our little island stamp its mark on the national monument.

The end of the rally was also heart-warming.

After coming off a tumultuous ferry journey through the rough seas in the dark, all of the rally drove in convoy down the harbour front a couple of times, tooting their horns and setting off fireworks.

It was a spectacular and fitting climax.

Yet so much more happened on the rally and it’s impossible to do it justice through a single person writing a daily blog.

All 160 odd people who were on the rally have their own stories and experiences that could fill a book.

Sadly there was one casualty today.

The Dude Where’s My Car team’s fur covered Datsun Bluebird with a golf tee on it’s roof, which was awarded the banger of the trip by the other teams, finally packed up half an hour out of Paris.

It got towed down to St Malo while the lads will have to endure another night on tour.

They will no doubt try their hardest to make the best out of a bad situation.

With regards to broken cars, a big shout out must go to John Dunne and Dale Crowsley, or Dave as he likes to be known, in the support vehicle.

Crowsley as managing director of Forest Road Garage also supplied our Mazda 323 and Island FM’s KIA.

Mention also has to go to my team mate Nick Mann.

We didn’t have one falling out apart from going onto the Arc de Triomphe for the first time and I momentarily failed to appreciate his constructive criticism of my driving.

All the other rally goers deserve praise as well.

There was not one bad apple in the bunch.

But there is one person who needs to be singled out and that is Brin Harrison.

It is mindboggling to think how much effort he has put in over the last year in organising the event which has been nothing less than awesome.

The whole rally has been a wonderful experience and it is all down to Harrison.

Driving round in his customised Renault 2 ½ Special, he always had a smile on his face and went out of his way to ensure that everyone was involved.

Thanks to him, and to all of the participants, the five days raised more than £25,000 for the Mines Awareness Trust.

I don’t know if there is a 2008 Guernsey unsung hero award going, but Mr Bailiff sir, if you’re reading this, get ready to give this man an accolade.

He has done Guernsey proud.(thisisguernsey)