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Grave decision...

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Post by GD Mon 18 Apr 2011, 6:50 pm

A grieving husband has been refused permission to put a headstone on his wife's grave - because it is black.

Danny Michel wants to commemorate his late wife with a granite stone - but the rules say any gravestones must be made from material sourced in Jersey.

It is almost a year since the death of his late wife, and Danny says he has not been allowed to properly grieve.

He has happy memories of his 35-year marriage to Violet and he wants to give her a fitting tribute, but choosing her gravestone has caused him nothing but misery.

Danny said: "I was told it had been rejected because it was black and then I've been trying to think about speaking to family and all sorts going on since then and we've been seeing what to do and having discussions and about a fortnight ago it was rejected again."

However, Les Quennevais Cemetery actually already has 13 black headstones.

Danny has pointed out some of the black headstones and said that he would like similar. He would like a black stone, with the centre etched out to reveal a greyish colour of stone. He says he would like this because it looks like a broken heart, with Violet's name on one side and the other would be for when he is buried.

It all comes down to what is written in the Parish Rate's Book. There are rules and regulations to determine what kind of stones are allowed in cemeteries and it reads: 'monuments should be made of natural stone such as is traditionally used in Jersey buildings or stone closely similar in colour and texture'.

So that excludes black granite, which is not a natural material in Jersey.

The man responsible for refusing the gravestone is St Brelades constable Mike Jackson - so why has he allowed other black headstones in the cemetery?

He explained: "Those earlier stones were granted on the basis of the previous practice but I soon after received complaints from the public about the black gravestones and thought the most practical solution and pragmatic solution was to stick rigorously to the regulations."

Danny wants to call a Parish Assembly on the matter. He is putting together a petition and he has much support.

Deputy Sean Power, of St Brelade Number One, said: "He wants to commemorate her with a suitable headstone and he likes black, and obviously the issue is the colour. I feel that if he feels that it's in keeping with the other headstones that he sees in the cemeteries he should be allowed to carry on and commemorate his wife."

With the anniversary of his wife's death approaching, Danny just wishes he could complete her memorial, and move on. (from CTV)

How sad... Grave decision... 400724
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Post by Spirit Mon 18 Apr 2011, 8:46 pm

Very petty
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Post by KiwiG Tue 19 Apr 2011, 5:28 am

You can always rely on rules and regulations eh?
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Post by Thistle Tue 19 Apr 2011, 7:23 am

very sad...typical jobsworth...does it really matter if the stone was sourced in jsy x
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